Adventures in Optometry
Aug. 11th, 2005 08:36 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
thewingedwordI've heard people complain about many different types of doctors- dentists, orthodontists, dermatologists, etc. Due to my lovely genetic inheritance I've had experience with all of them- particularly the orthodontist. Just a few hours ago, I once again delighted in the joys of the optometrist.
Optometry seems to be, in my opinion, a novel type of torture. One machine in particular tests for something I've never heard of and probably wouldn't recognize if it danced a jig on my moniter. You gaze into the eye of this machine; if you've had any experience with it before, your eye is watering in awful anticipation while someone adjusts and re-adjusts it. When the ornery machine is ready, a puff of air shoots into your eye. Afterwards, as you blink and rub your eye, the attendant will say "You blinked too fast." With an accusatory glare, as if you had purposely enhanced your reflexes to make her life less simple.
I also got my eyes dilated, which is almost worse. My optometrist has the idea that when my pupils are hugely dilated and incredibly sensitive is the best time to shine a bright light into them. Looking into the mirror I can see that the center part of my eye is solid blackness, rimmed with a thin line of gold. My computer screen is a little hard to look at and the white walls seem to glow. Looking at a shaded light fixture is like gazing into the sun.
This is a whole entry of whining, and I hate to do that. Even more do I hate to write about what I did rather than what I thought, but it's a special occasion. Please don't think the worse of me.
~Irritable, Kit
Optometry seems to be, in my opinion, a novel type of torture. One machine in particular tests for something I've never heard of and probably wouldn't recognize if it danced a jig on my moniter. You gaze into the eye of this machine; if you've had any experience with it before, your eye is watering in awful anticipation while someone adjusts and re-adjusts it. When the ornery machine is ready, a puff of air shoots into your eye. Afterwards, as you blink and rub your eye, the attendant will say "You blinked too fast." With an accusatory glare, as if you had purposely enhanced your reflexes to make her life less simple.
I also got my eyes dilated, which is almost worse. My optometrist has the idea that when my pupils are hugely dilated and incredibly sensitive is the best time to shine a bright light into them. Looking into the mirror I can see that the center part of my eye is solid blackness, rimmed with a thin line of gold. My computer screen is a little hard to look at and the white walls seem to glow. Looking at a shaded light fixture is like gazing into the sun.
This is a whole entry of whining, and I hate to do that. Even more do I hate to write about what I did rather than what I thought, but it's a special occasion. Please don't think the worse of me.
~Irritable, Kit